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Posted on Wed Aug 25th, 2021 @ 8:56am by Lieutenant Veznia MD PSyD & Lieutenant Commander Calvin Morgan

Mission: Double Bind
Location: Counselling Suite
Timeline: Current

The day following her meeting with the Captain, Lieutenant Veznia sent a message to Commander Morgan summoning him for a counselling session. The Captain had requested that Vez evaluate the senior staff to gage how well they were coping the the tragedy that befell their previous ship.

As the time approached, Veznia moved about the suite lighting a Vulcan meditation lamp and a number of candles. The overheads light were dimmed though not turned off completely. The room had the faint scent of tea, that was brewing on the the low table near the center of the space. Vez lowered herself onto a cushion and waited for the CMO's arrival.

Calvin stepped into the Counseling Suite, admiring a section of the ship he hadn't seen yet. Standard for himself, his blue uniform undershirt, rolled up to his elbows was unadorned with his uniform jacket, which hung in his office. He had hopped over from sickbay, having done a quick round of patients before walking the short trek to this office. With a quick nod to the admin, he knocked and entered Lt Veznia's office after being beckoned in.

"Welcome." Veznia said with a wide Denobulan smile. "How's Sickbay today?" she asked, hoping to ease into the more serious chat they needed to have.

"Slow and steady, the way I like it," Calvin responded, sitting down in a chair. He surveyed the room briefly before focusing in on the other officer in the room. "Gives time to work out the kinks of a new space."

Vez nodded. "It's important to make a workspace your own." She stood and moved to a chair as well. "I wanted to check in with you. I understand you served on the last Astraea?"

Calvin nodded. "I did yes, I believe the majority of the crew did. A few transfers away and retirements, but everyone who survived stayed," Calvin responded.

"How are you coping with the loss of your last ship and so many comrades?" Veznia asked plainly, hoping to illicit a reaction of some kind to give her a jumping off point.

"Fine," Calvin replied, leaning forward in his chair slightly. "Medical didn't lose too many," He paused, adding after a moment "fortunately." He studied the officer in front of him. "As for the ship, well a home is a home until it's not. And a new home is found." He watched closely for reactions. "You're going to have a lot of meetings if you intend to meet with every crew member from the incident."

"Let's not focus on me, I want to know how you're dealing with it." Veznia smiled warmly. "Preferably with more than one syllable."

Calvin leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms across his chest with a subtle smirk. "I'm dan-dy," He responded, ensuring to enunciate the two syllables.

The counsellor's eyes fluttered for a brief moment. She tried to redirect "What was it like? being on board, knowing it was doomed?"

"Didn't know it was doomed until the evacuation order was given. At that point, you don't have time to think, you know? Like being elbow deep in a patient. There isn't doom until it's over. We tried to save her, tried to save as many as we could when we couldn't save her," Calvin shrugged, repositioning himself slightly.

"That must've been hard for you as a doctor." Neevara leaned in. "Not being able to save everyone?"

Calvin leaned forward slightly, to mirror Neevara's posture. "Sure, every death is, as I'm sure every person you can't help is hard. However I learned long ago to count the attempts, not the outcomes." He leaned back, a slight defeat in his posture. "Can't save them all."

"While that's true, it certainly can affect us in odd ways." Veznia added. "How are you finding the new crew, particularly those assigned to Medical?"

"They are fine. New crew always need some training and settling time. It'll run like a well oiled machine eventually," Calvin replied. "How are you settling in?"

"Pretty well." Veznia said with a singsong quality to her voice."The crew is really friendly." She pursed her lips. "but we aren't her to talk about me."

"What are we here to talk about then?" Calvin inquired back.

She offered a pointed look to the Chief Medical Officer. "You."

"What's there to talk about?" He inquired back, shifting slightly, some discomfort of being the center focus of the situation.

"Anything that weighs on you." Veznia offered as a stepping off point.

"Well," Calvin started, leaning forward. "I have two bio beds that have yet to be certified for use because they keep breaking down. A dozen charts to finish. One disciplinary matter to attend to for repeated tardiness of shift. A potential MCI depending on what they figure out with a rogue planet. Those are all weighing on me."

Veznia blinked a few times."Is it overwhelming at all? Feeling as though you have so much on your plate?"

Calvin raised an eyebrow to contemplate the question. "Only in the sense that I'm here and not there working," He responded. "I mean, did I just get preselected for a chat? Or is someone concerned about me?"

The Denobulan puffed her face slightly. "It's curious that you would say that. Do you think that anyone has reason to be concerned for you?"

"Only in the sense that I'm here and didn't ask for an appointment," Calvin shot back calmly. "I don't remember throwing my name into the lottery for a checkup. And last time I checked, I'm getting my job done. My department is running as smoothly as any can on a brand new vessel. I haven't been thrown in the brig yet for causing problems off duty," he continued, with a subtle edge of defensiveness.

"Do you think that job performance is the only measure of your wellbeing as an officer in Starfleet?" Veznia was taken aback slightly by his defence. "Yes, concerns were raised with regards to you, but I don't believe it had anything to do with your professional performance. It was concern born out of personal regard for your mental wellbeing, in particular the feeling that you may have taken the destruction of the last Astraea and the loss of life to heart." The Counsellor spoke with distinct firmness about the intent.

“I think it is *an* indicator. I wouldn’t insult yourself or myself and say it’s the only one. Just like blood pressure isn’t the only indicator of a healthy person.” Calvin replied, a little sharp, but professional. “I could have saved you this time. I’m not taking it to heart, I’m fine.” He clapped his hands gently onto his knees to emphasize the point. “Now if you’ll excuse me I’ll be getting back to Sickbay,” He added, standing up.

"If you wish." Veznia stood also. "But I think we should make another appointment to see each other."

Calvin opened his mouth but stopped himself, seeing the sarcastic comment probably not going well to another provider. He above all else, understood the misguided but well intended work his fellow doctor was performing. "Throw it on my schedule, but I'm not sure what else you're looking for." He said, nodding his head in a good bye before turning to leave the room. He sighed heavily after the door closed, his mind elsewhere besides his upcoming work.

Veznia followed behind him. "I'll make our next appointment for next week. " Her pace increased to keep up. "In the meantime, I'd like to come observe you at work."

Calvin stopped and turned to the officer, the two of them not being more than 5 feet apart at this point. He raised an eyebrow before relaxing and continuing on. “As you wish sir.”

Veznia was quickly outpaced as she struggled to follow. She was already out of breath. "Do you," she gasped for air,"always walk so quickly?" she asked.

Calvin slowed down slightly out of courtesy for the fellow officer. "Usually only when I have things to do and not enough time. However I didn't realize by you observing me at work, you meant now"

Veznia inflated her face and exhaled, trying to slow her breathing to it's normal rhythm. "What things do you not have enough time for?" She asked.

"Unasked for therapy sessions during the work day?" Calvin responded, keeping a slower pace for the other officer.

"A necessary part of service in Starfleet." Veznia corrected, her breathing slowing to normal. "Whats on the agenda for the rest of the day?" she asked eagerly.

“Several check ups, charting, some maintenance probably,” He replied simply turning the corner to go down the last corridor to Sickbay. It was obvious he was over this conversation at this point.

"Sounds exciting." Veznia commented. "What sort of maintenance?"

Calvin stopped at the door of Sickbay, making a quick 180 degree turn to be eye to eye with the other officer. "Maintenance," He replied bluntly. "If you want to nitpick every iota of my life so be it, but do it quietly. These questions are getting old, fast. I agreed to this Petri dish activity to get you off my back, which you seem to have only clung harder. I would appreciate professional courtesy and you staying out of my way, and more importantly my staff's. If you can not handle that, do not step into my Sickbay. If you step in and can't handle that, do not expect to leave under your own locomotion." His eyes showed a darkness unnatural for his face with his concern for his staff quite evident with the veiled but evident anger in his calm and metered voice.

Instinct took over and Veznia inflated her face as the man turned to her so abruptly. "I am merely doing my job Doctor." Her voice was even and calm. She was silent for a moment in thought. "I think I've seen enough for today." She said, taking a cautious step back. "I will leave you to your work, and see you next week."


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